12:54 A.M. - Friday, May. 11, 2007
Pictures of the past
So many thoughts have trickled through my mind like never-ending waves that glide across the sands, although nothing I could pencil in. Drifting thoughts have eluded me night and day. I was trying to allow words to flow from mind to keyboard with no avail.

Deciding I was floundering I immersed my self in an idea I had for "my space" a little slide show presenting past to present. I became lost in memories looking at photos from long ago.

Those pictures took me on a trip that was amazing; every photo told a story about times gone by. I recalled so many bitter thoughts I once harbored about years from the past, although while looking at the photos I found myself in a state of wonder.

I found not one photo of faces looking solemn, sad, or distrustful, I witnessed smiles, little games we played on each other, and silly poses as each of us found humor within our rocky little world.

I smiled as thoughts drifted back through many years I once felt should be buried beneath the sands and never looked upon again.

I found a passage we took as each picture held the key to a door waiting to open; each photo was a beginning or end to a chapter in our lives.

During past times of struggles there were times I had wished I had never been born, I longed for my life to end, I felt nothing good would ever become of many sorrows. Today I looked upon those same times in picture form and saw where each tribulation I walked through I became stronger, after every fall I got back up, from every painful mistake I could see what bit of wisdom I carried away with me.

None of my past was in vain, no mistake was I unable to forgive myself for, through heartache came blessings, although some took years for me to understand what was being revealed but I could now see my path in a clearer light. I felt blessed to have walked the path I chose, no fault but my own choosing.

I found I have but little regret; every step I took brought me to this moment in time.

Not all may be a tidy little package that others might long for, but for me the love over the years was worth the walk. I wouldn't trade a moment of my past and take the chance to altered the outcome.

Years ago I would never believed these thoughts would enter my mind. Too much sorrow and heart break but for each tear shed I learned a lesson about life in the flesh and that is what I walked away with.

I have so much to feel blessed with, and for this, I thank God.

Sandyz
My sister and I
picture of yesteryears

The present

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