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2:27 P.M. - Sunday, Apr. 03, 2011
A weird place
Some times I feel as if I am in a weird place�kind of like trying to navigate the ocean in a small sail boat with out a map. I drift here and there, ride the waves during a storm, then drift again searching for something that hasn�t got a name let alone an identity. I don�t think it�s a real place�so it�s not a destination. It just could be that I am in search of a place within.

Like hidden treasure that might not be worth a dime�but it feels like it has a worth. Or maybe something lost?

Forgotten?

Buried?

Was it blown away in the sands of time or did it settle deep within the blue?

Questions without answers because the inquisition is unclear.

I lack motivation�the house is a mess.

I lack inspiration�I listen to music and can�t remember the words.

I lack creativity�I attend art class and come home empty handed.

I lack ambition�I haven�t a clue what I want to do today let alone tomorrow.

I am not depressed�I just lack direction.

Don�t know where I want to be�here?

There?

No where.

I don�t know what I like to eat�every day I get closer to vegan. I haven�t eaten any meat products from the day I got back from Indy�except 1% milk�then again who cares�doesn�t mean a thing. It has nothing to do with the future�goals, what I want to accomplish, where I want to end up.

Maybe for awhile I�ll just sail along�maybe something will enlighten me and the will to pick up the oars and map my course will be stronger than comfort of just living in the moment.

Maybe�maybe not.

Sandyz

 

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