2:27 P.M. - Sunday, Aug. 23, 2009
Remembering
Yesterday when waking I came into my computer room and saw the book I wrote on the little stand where I had left it. Picking it up a flood of memories cascaded through my soul�tears came. Yesterday was the anniversary of the day time stopped, the moment our world forever changed, an event that took a young life before mine.

One might wonder how after so many years have slid through the hour glass of time why someone would feel as if it happened just day�s ago. I have no answer, nor will I ever.

I ached to visit the stone placed in loving memory of my young grandson�I couldn�t take those steps. As a great sadness surrounded me I searched inward trying to locate beautiful memories of days we shared our lives with this little spirit�however sorrow clouded them as questions of why found a path to my heart. My thoughts drifted to my daughter�I could feel her pain, her memories, her loss. Helpless as a mother�I can�t fix this, change this, nor take the burden of loss from her heart. I feel useless�nothing I say or do will lighted her step.

More tears came.

When I first held my book there was felt a sense of closure�yesterday a new wound opened. Unable to fight my anguish I tried to embrace it, walk along with it as not to lose myself once again in a colorless world. If not for the times we feel inconceivable grief we may not learn to fully appreciate limitless love. Reversal of life�s cycle appears senseless, unnatural, but for every tear that flows I believe there is purpose.

Today a new life beckons�the wound is healing, the sun is out, and time ticks forward�life once again a beautiful sight to behold. I found the path out of the murkiness.

Memories�some to cherish�and others left unanswered�wistful in the songs of yesterday.

Sandyz
(Picture of love...my grandson and his sister many years ago...I will forever miss him)

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