2:24 P.M. - Sunday, Oct. 14, 2007
Time to move on
These final trips down the gravel road are not easy to make, memories lurk in every turn over every hill, and my heart aches when I drive up to this little house nestled on top the mountain. Tomorrow is closing day, one last day to call this place my own, then I'll pass the torch, one that for a moment in time burned bright with thoughts of a future, my final hours in an place I once called home as fall brings on her glorious colors.

The most difficult hours are behind me as a new adventure awaits us, my cats and me. My heart is saddened when I gaze across the mountains but know deep within me there is beauty everywhere, it starts in the heart.

After the closing it will be a blur of last minute preparations before leaving, racing one last time through the little town below the mountain to bring closure. Those last moment goodbyes, picking up my rental trailer and loading it with the boxes that sit along the walls of this little house, a nights rest if possible and one final feel of the gravel beneath the tires, my destination, Florida.

A part of me doesn't want to leave but a call deep within is beckoning me to move forward, to shake the past, to take those steps. No backing up, it's off the mountain a new beginning.

I wonder at times why letting go even when sadness has consumed us is difficult at times. I would think this would be a time to rejoice to celebrate to sing and dance. But I find myself longing to touch something familiar, to find happiness that stands in the shadows of yesterday, to belong, to forget, yet I must release the pain to move forward, I know this.

Once I am on my way I know my heart will lighten, my thoughts will be brighter, but for now it's the waiting, the blasted waiting, it's time to move on.

Sandyz

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